Are you serious?

So...today I was reminded why I want to leave the house. It's really only my father. Look, no one is denying the sacrifices he's made, or the money he's shelled out for my education and all of that stuff. At the same time, I'm not going to give him a pass for being the father that HE thought was good enough. He could have left the house when I was three like his father did to him, and he didn't and for that I can semi painfully utter the fact that I am thankful.

But being a father is more than just providing a shelter, or putting up bread for private school and all of that sh*t. Being a father is spending time, getting to know and understand your child. Making your child feel comfortable around you, allowing them to share anything with you. Not being judgmental, not being self-righteous, not being selfish, and plainly not being an asshole.

He doesn't understand that his opportunity to share the crucial life wisdom with me is long gone. He had those chances when I lived in the house year round pre-college, and when I was not old enough to be able to make crucial life decisions on my own. As far as I'm concerned, I am way ahead of the curve he was on at my age, in fact he wasn't on my curve. And I am not asking for the perfect father. I know perfection isn't real. I know people will make mistakes and people need to be given forgiveness. This whole thing may sound like I am resentful as hell, but all it is is me putting everything in perspective.

He doesn't know me at all. All he talks about is God and God and God. I love God, believe in God - but sometimes I just need to talk to my father, not be reminded about God and his goodness because I am fully aware. For too long he relied on the crutch that his pops wasn't around him past the age of three, so that must means he's the bomb for having never left. I guess, but no.
When I've been away for three years in college learning literally finding myself, and fashioning my own personal beliefs, virtues, and ways to live life, when I come home is not the time for him to try and reassert himself in an attempt to salvage some of the time that you spent most of my 21 years wasting. The nature of our relationship is pretty much set in stone. I will always love him, but I've been past the point where I needed him. And I only got to that point so quickly because he allowed me to.

Save it.

Text vs Tweet

Some interesting shit was brought to my attention yesterday afternoon. People are now starting to substitute twitter, for text messaging. It makes sense..the cheapest plan with unlimited text from Sprint is $99 a month, with AT&T you'll pay at least an additional $20 a month for unlimited text messaging with their cheapest individual plan (which starts at $40/month). I won't even mention Verizon because the rates were ridiculous.. On the other hand, you can create your own personalized username on Twitter and direct message anyone, for no cost. Since Twitter is quickly becoming another global and viral social networking phenomenon, making the switch from paying for text messaging to using the direct message feature on twittter more often - maybe even exclusively - may not be such a bad idea for those who are paying outrageous rates for texting, and seem to find more than half of their cell phone book on their list of "followers"...